My life in a nutshell, part 1.

I really think Im cursed. Everytime i take one step forward, i fall two steps backwards. Nothing feels right anymore, nothing even seems right. im losing my perception of what is and what isnt. Maybe its just my mind.
Anyways, how are you world?
Its been a few days, I hope your Xmas is fine.
Ive been wanting to get something off of my chest for awhile,
so i think ill do so here.

but the thing is, its my life story.
so.... here it is.

I was born in Tulsa, Oklahoma on January 19th, 1993. I was premature. My mother was only 17 and my father was 19. they werent married. I was an accident.
Before I was the age of seven, I moved 12 times, 3 of them being in texas, the rest in tulsa and coweta.

My parents seperated, and my dad got me every other weekend. it was customary to me, so i thought nothing of it.
When i was 4, my mother had Jeremiah, my brother.
when i was 5, Zachary.
the point is, my mother has had six kids, and I am the oldest.

When i was seven, we finally settled in Downtown tulsa, where i attended Kendell-Whitter for four years. My mom had just married my stepdad, Tony, who at the time, didnt drink.

Four four years, i attended that school, until we found a better house, in Broken Arrow. Then, I went to Oak Crest for my 5th grade class. I was an outcast. I didnt know anybody. I fell into depression.

6th grade. I was in a bad shape. My stepdad would beat me. He'd get drunk and high and just destroy me. I couldnt take it. Im not one of those people who just sit and do nothing. So..
I acted.

On November 12th, 2005, I went to a safe place. It just so happened that on that day, my grandma died too.
My stepdad went into a frenzy.
He destroyed everything i owned and called my real dad.
I went to live with him.

skip ahead six months, Im back in BA, things are going good.
Seventh grade was pretty uneventful. Had my first GF. Got my first taste of a relationship.
Eighth grade was alright, nothing important.
and then,
9th grade.

I moved to Arkansas.
That is all i will tell of the story for now.

10th grade still gives me the chills from the memories and the love lost.

I had my first kiss in 10th grade, and that was when i first fell in love.
for six months, things were perfect.
then, i was heartbroken.

The girl i thought i loved told me she cheated on me. that was my first touch with suicide.
But it is also where i met one of my closest friends.
At the time, I was in a band called Ares Effect. We never played a show and we BARELY got one song down.
but it was fun. greatest time of my life.

It was me on drums.
Jacob on bass
Ty on guitar
and Heather as singer.

I remember the good times i had.

I also remember when the band broke up and i first started having feelings for heather.

After me and the one i "loved" broke up, I started dating heather. things were going excellent.
But those memories of the time i used to have still lingered within my mind.

Then, she started talking to me again.
long story short,
I went back for that girl.
Only to realize that after three months, i didnt love her.
I didnt love anyone anymore.

Then, i had my first run in with death.

Ill have to finish this another time, world.
Til next time..
Justice.